Living with Chronic Pain and Illness: How Therapy Can Make a Difference
By Stacey McDonald
Living with chronic pain and illness impacts every part of your life. Whether you’re explaining your condition to loved ones, constantly managing symptoms, medications, and doctor’s appointments or just trying to do the very “normal” tasks of daily functioning - chronic conditions can get in the way. Over time, the anger, frustration and stress that can come with this reality can take a toll on your mental health. And for many, this can start a vicious cycle where your mental health leads to more flare-ups and worsening symptoms which negatively impact your mental health and so on. So, how can therapy make a difference in your chronic conditions? Let’s take a look.
Life with Chronic Pain and Illness
In 2021, more than one-third of adults in over 100 countries (OECD) report living with longstanding illness or health problems and about 30% of the global population report living with chronic pain (Lancet). This issue has reached epidemic proportions in many countries worldwide including Canada and the United States. One of the challenges with chronic pain and illness is that these conditions are often invisible. As a result, those living with chronic conditions can appear "healthy," making it more difficult for them to access support and accommodations or get diagnosed and obtain proper treatment. Those living with chronic conditions can often thrive in daily life with appropriate treatment and accomodations, however learning your unique needs can be a long and difficult process. Because of that, these adjustments are often overlooked or misunderstood, leading to negative consequences in work, relationships, and hobbies. The mental health toll can be severe, and this often contributes to a vicious cycle of worsening symptoms and emotional strain.
How Chronic Pain and Illness Affect Mental Health
If you’ve ever noticed butterflies in your stomach when nervous for a date, or felt queasy ahead of a big presentation you’ve experienced the mind-body connection. This mind-body connection plays a significant role in the way chronic pain and illness affect mental health. As you become more familiar with your condition, you might begin to notice how your emotional state can impact your physical symptoms. If you live with chronic pain or illness, you might also struggle with some of the following:
Depression and anxiety: The constant battle with pain and other physical symptoms can be overwhelming, often limiting how much you can engage with the things and people you love. This can lead to feelings of sadness, helplessness, and worry, ultimately leading to depression and/or anxiety.
Loneliness and isolation: It can be hard for those who don't have firsthand experience with chronic pain to truly understand your situation. This paired with physical symptoms, may cause you to withdraw from social activities, leading to a sense of being alone in your experience.
Frustration and anger: The frustration of dealing with a chronic condition, especially when you're struggling to get a diagnosis or support, can lead to intense feelings of anger. The sudden change to the life you had planned can be scary.
Sleep problems: Chronic pain can interfere with your ability to sleep, and as we all know, poor sleep can worsen both physical and emotional health, leading to a cycle that’s hard to break.
How Therapy Can Support You in Managing Chronic Pain and Illness
While it may not be your first thought when you’re trying to find ways to manage your chronic health conditions, psychotherapy can be an essential part of the puzzle. While therapy may add another appointment to your already overfilled calendar of doctors visits, there’s a lot your therapist can do to help improve and maintain your mental health and quality of life.
Symptom Management: While doctors and specialists help manage physical symptoms, a therapist can support you in understanding how your emotional state impacts your physical symptoms. Stress is a major factor in worsening symptoms and flare-ups, and therapists are a great resource for helping you find appropriate coping skills and stress-management techniques that work for you.
Acceptance: Acceptance does not mean resigning yourself to suffering. It’s about learning to live with your condition in a way that aligns with your values and still allows for meaningful experiences. Therapy, particularly through approaches like Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), helps you accept the parts of life you can't change while focusing on what you can control—your goals, values, and actions.
Emotional Support: Living with chronic pain can be exhausting, and sometimes, you just need to vent. While friends and family can be supportive, they may not fully understand your experience. A therapist, especially one with lived experience of chronic pain and illness, provides a non-judgmental space to explore your feelings and thoughts without the need to over-explain (or justify) them.
Managing Stress and Coping Skills: Therapy can help identify major stressors, process emotions, and teach you techniques like mindfulness, which can reduce stress and improve emotional regulation.
Identity Exploration: Chronic pain and illness can challenge your sense of self. Whether you’ve lived with a chronic condition for years or it’s a recent diagnosis, the impact on your identity can be destabilizing. Therapy offers a safe space for exploring your changing identity, helping you reconnect with your values, discover new interests, and create a life that feels fulfilling.
Is Chronic Pain Affecting Your Mental Health?
Living with chronic pain and illness is tough, there’s no denying that, but it doesn’t have to mean your life stops altogether. Therapy, especially working with a therapist who understands chronic pain and illness, offers a valuable opportunity to process emotions, learn more effective ways of coping, and explore your evolving identity and goals. It gives you the opportunity to look to a future where you feel more in control - and that’s exciting!
About The Author
Stacey McDonald is a Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying) from Guelph, ON offering virtual therapy across Ontario. She works with adults 18+ living with chronic pain and illness, the 2SLGBTQIA+ community and those navigating identity and major life transitions. You can connect with Stacey at her website, goodthankstherapy.ca.